Smiling on the Inside

It's all about karma. Remember my previous blog about my family member who told me that I wasn't huge anymore, that now I was just fat? That was a few months ago. Now picture this...
She calls me to go out shopping with her. Now mind you, the echo of the words she said to me months ago still screech in my head like nails on a chalkboard. Thinking that now that we are the same size, I am willing to go out to the stores with her for clothing. So, as I'm searching for my size large or medium shirts and my size 12/14 jeans, she calls out to me "Get me a 2x shirt and 16/18 jeans if you come across any". I was in shock! Not only am I not huge anymore, I'm smaller than she is!!! OMG! No way! Here I sat comparing myself to her, wondering if I am the same size or still bigger than her. But I'm SMALLERRRRR!!!! I don't think I have ever smiled so much on the inside ever before. I even got the courage to say "Oh, btw, I have clothing you can have that's too big for me". Ahhhh that felt sooooooo good. I know it sounds mean but I have never been so happy to feel good about someone else's misfortune. But, she brought it on herself. Karma...it's a bitch! HA!

Insert Foot In Mouth

This past week was my weigh in and I am still losing more than I think. I'm now down 96 lbs, as of last Thursday. It's crazy that I'm almost at the 100 mark. It's maybe even more exciting than getting into 'onederland'.

So, 4th of July...Picture this...

I'm standing in line to get the kids food, and I look to my left to see someone I have seen at other events, yet don't know personally. I, being polite, say hello. She looks back, says hello and then asks the NO-NO question. She says "When are you due?". I have NEVER wanted to beat the living crap out of someone as I did just then. My heart sank. But I get up the courage, think of something and say "I'm not pregnant, I've just lost almost 100 lbs, but thanks anyway". Boy did she feel stupid. As I go about my business, I hear her saying "I'm so sorry. I'm so embarassed". So as I'm walking away, I say, "Well, you should be".

I mean, what a bitch. Now mind you I had a shirt that was tighter around the chest and poofy-er on the bottom(see pic) but NEVER, NEVER ask someone if they are pregnant if you don't know that they truly are. I mean wtf. Here I am having a hard enough time seeing the difference in the weight that I have lost and I have strangers asking me when I'm expecting. Do I still really look that fat? I mean, even when I was almost 300 lbs, no one ever asked me. I guess then I just looked fat and not pregnant. But really...WTF!

So, here's the moral of my story. Don't EVER ask that question to someone you don't know.

Keep on Swimmin...

So, the weightloss is definitely slowing down. I still weigh my proteins, and eat what's best for me but I think my body is at the WTF stage. Someone said recently that everyone's body has a 'happy weight'. I don't believe it. I know I am destined to hit goal. 43 to go! I have been trying to get to the gym more often. I think some days, I don't eat enough. Maybe that is my problem. I'm still losing, just slower. But hey...93 lbs in 9 months is awesome...right?

HOLY INCHES BATMAN!

Just wanted to do a quicky blog that I measured the amount of inches gone so far....58.5 inches!!! Wow! 88lbs down really does a lot!!! Go me!

Get the F Outta here!

So, I went to Dress Barn today to find a new dress for my cousin's bat mitzvah. I do love the previous one but it's a religious event and a daytime party, so it was a little too formal. I will be saving that one for a later to get altered when I need it.

Anyways...back to Dress Barn...

I gather up a bunch of 16s and go into the dressing room. I try the first one on, too big. Then the next, too big. NO FREAKIN WAY! I couldn't believe it! I had try on 14s!!!! SERIOUSLY NO FREAKIN WAY! LOL

So, I bought my first 14 since who knows when! I still can't believe it!!! NO FREAKIN WAY!! HAHAAAA!

Here is the pic...what do you think?

Welcome to ONEDERLAND!!!!

So yay! I'm finally at the hump in my journey! Onederland! Onederland, for those who are clueless, means I am no longer in the 200's. I weighed on my scale today at 199. The last time I was 199 was, back in 1997. Wow. That's insane! That leaves me with 49 lbs til goal!
This is insane. I still have days that I can't believe I actually went through with this surgery. I was scared, nervous, you name it! But, I did it! And now, look at me.
I'm finally starting to feel comfortable when running into people I haven't seen since college/high school. Some days are still hard. I look in the mirror and instead of being like 'eh, who cares', I look and say 'omg this is fat and this is fat and this skin sucks and that skin sucks'. It's horrible. I know I'm not alone out there. It's a stage that most bariatric patients go through. And I even have friends who have always been a size 4 and they even think they are fat. I'm like "you wanna see fat", as I show them my belly skin. Atleast I can make someone feel good off of my nasty belly.
I sometimes ponder putting a photo up of the nastyness that goes on under my clothing. My body has been through a lot over the last 2 years. The twin pregnancy had my skin stretched to max, and then the surgery/weight loss was an added bonus. My stomach has officially swallowed my belly button, as my daughter explains it. So, once the 6month post-goal comes, I will be having atleast the tummy tuck and then hopefully the boobage done too. I can't wait! Woohooooo!

Stress can be a wonderful thing!

A lot has been going on with my kids being sick and one continuously hospitalized. But, on the bright side, all the stress and restriction combined together and I'm now 83 lbs down since banded 7 months ago!

So, I retried on a dress I tried on in the middle of March and it is looking nicer, isn't as snug and my boobs aren't falling out as much as they were. lol

I still have a way to go but I'm hoping to wear this dress to an event in June. As long as I stay on track, it should fit wonderfully by then and my side view won't look so huge.